Take charge

‘Life is what you make of it not what the world paints it to be’

 

By Katleho Morapela

Clothes tightly fitting, lips coloured red, hair extension 16 inches long that’s Thabang Matsoso’s favourite look.  Born a man and chose to live as a women Thabang calls herself a transgender women and this goes with a name change too. “Because Thabang is generally a boy’s name I just chose to call myself ‘T-yonce Mbau’ being a big fan of Beyoncé Knowles and Khanyi Mbau the name occurred to me very easily”.

Being a talented young person T-yonce looked up to media icons such as Beyoncé Knowles from a tender age. She describes herself as an artistic, flamboyant individual and this is indeed evident in the nature of works she does. She is a dancer, stage presenter, radio news anchor, drama producer the list is endless. Coming from an impoverished background T-yonce does not let herself be a victim of circumstances.

Born and breed in Bloemfontein her childhood was nothing like honey and chocolate. She was raised by a single parent with 4 siblings.  Besides financial constraints her biggest childhood challenge as she puts it “has always been standing out and being the purple sheep among my peers as it was regarded problematic within the African society”.

It is unfortunate that we still live in societies that harbor racial and gender based prejudices, societies that place norms and expectations on how an individual is to act and behave. Its people like T-yonce that challenges those boundaries, people that qualifies the ‘odd’ to be ‘normal’. She points out that “Accountability for one’s life depends on oneself not mere philosophies that depict how one’s life should be led. Norms are there to guide people not dictate them”.

Transgender women at the age of (26) T-yonce discovered from a tender age of (11) that she was different from all the other boys. It was in playing with girls that she felt most comfortable, “In contrast to humming the sound of a moving car and playing soccer, playing house and dressing up as a girl enticed me”, she giggles.

Family and relatives are other aspects of her life that she strongly values however, gaining her family’s support on her chosen lifestyle has been a long and tough journey. “When I started cross dressing in the year 2007 my family was stunned and very disapproving they would often burn some of my feminine clothes while I was away at school and arranged several family meetings in an attempt to reproach me; it was something new and bizarre to them”. With teary eyes she further explains that this was the most difficult time of her life “at schools my teachers would often tell me to harden my voice whenever I spoke, I was broken and uneasy at all times”. It was during this period in her 11^th grade at the age of 17 when she gained a tough skin and learned how to stand firm for what she wants.

Her schooling career began at Kruitberg Primary School and later progressed to Tsoseletso High School where she discovered her enthusiasm for performing arts and interest in languages. Soon after completing her matric she decided to pursue a tertiary qualification in Language Practice majoring in English. Whilst at tertiary her sexuality once again became an issue for many people and would often be criticized based on how she dresses, speaks, and walks on all thing qualified to be feminine. She nonetheless accomplished what was once her academic dream and obtained her qualification.

When we talk about nation builders we talk of young people that are self- driven, young people that are ambitious and not afraid to pursue their dreams. Choosing a career that places oneself in a public domain where the public scrutinize you is not an easy task but T-yonce did.

Working in a fast paced and competitive industry such as in the entertainment industry one is faced with numerous trials and tribulations even so, T-yonce is adamant nothing and no one will ever break her “my biggest fear is disappointing myself in any way imaginable, failure is there to sharpen and groom us, what comes after that is disappointing yourself once again after enduring failure” she strongly asserts that life is what one makes of it not what the world paints it to be.

Besides venturing for opportunities to empower and emancipate herself and those in her surrounding, she still enjoys her youthful years of parties and love affairs. Speaking of her love life she giggles and describes it as complicated at this stage, she nonetheless imagines herself as having a family of her own one day with “children running around in the backyard and a husband just as complicated if not more” she says. 

“I want to be remembered as a ‘game changer’ that one brave transgender woman who brought about change in every craft she put her hands on” in simplest terms that the legacy Thabang Matsoso (#T-yonce Mbau) would like to leave behind.

In pursuit of success and overcoming life’s challenges T-yonce would advise South African youth to pave their own path and embraces challenges. She accentuates that “the biggest risk is not taking any risk at all”.